Seldom Seen Way











{April 26, 2017}   Not my Circus, Not my Monkeys

Being the good Polish girl that i was brought up to be, this idiom rings true in my Life. Basically – If it’s not your monkey, and it’s not even from your circus, then it’s not your problem.

4-26-2017 6-16-41 PM

i won’t interfere or bother myself with trouble in a place i don’t belong to or have no authority — it’s someone else’s job to deal with this.

The problem i have is when another person assumes you took a side when you only acknowledged someone’s frustration concerning something. And we do this with all friends and acquaintances that we are connected with on some level.

The other problem i have is when said person decided to email in a hostile manner without giving much thought into how it would be received. There was no context to what or who it was pertaining to. It does not make it any better when they write using the fact Community Leaders need to be careful who they “support”.  Being somewhat threatening to where our “loyalties” seem to lie, in my opinion, is a very low place to go. This person did not have the right to do that and was very disrespectful. It would be like me going to her Sir and lecturing him on who he should or should not associate with.

The next reply after Sir wrote her was to apologize that the email might be taken hostile.  It then became an email under the guise of being helpful, however, at that point, the damage was already done.

i would think that being mindful of the written word especially in this circumstance would have been prudent. If i ever did that to anyone and Sir found out – my arse would be more than black and blue (and not in a fun way).

i am the one that had to deal with Sir after this interaction. It was not pretty at all. He kept thinking He did something wrong and went back to see if He wrote something that could be thought of taking a side. There was not. We as a couple, ensure that is the case especially when drama may pop up. We are just as confused as everyone else once it started to explode in front of us. All we had were questions and it definitely wasn’t the time to ask them.

Perception can be a bitch – I agree. In this case, the person was making an assumption on something without even asking where we might have stood on said topic. And sadly we had to guess what the person was referring to initially.

Apparently, it is fine that they are able to pick a side and declare it – yet it is not allowed to others even if you are a Leader in the community. Personally, i do not think they should have stepped in either. Let the people that are running the event, clean up their own shit. All this is doing is making the lines pretty clear where people stand.

As Sir has said before, we will be Switzerland. We do not know either parties side to the situation and likely never will.

We do not attend this event due to when it is scheduled – usually a work weekend for Sir.

It is unfortunate that this has become a Shit-Show for all of the Fetlife participants and for the Community at Large in the City to witness. We did not consent to this mess being splayed across our screens (actually “gagged” individuals on my feed because of this) and i do not think people should drag others into it – even if it is only an assumption.

This is also unfortunate to what is going and is happening to the BDSM/Kink community.

I do hope it improves or at least all Egos are put on the side for the sake of the community without splitting it even further than it is.



{April 24, 2017}   It taunts me…

the Write button… posted in the corner of the screen. It has a small (8) beside it. That is 8 drafts sitting in waiting.

There are several more drafts waiting in my head to be started and not finished. Last week i have already deleted 4 from the list…

i get all gong ho to write, sit down to start or finish one… and then the brain gives me a gentle fuck you. It seems to be enough to procrastinate even more. It doesn’t matter what else i choose to call it – it is just that.

Then the procrastination becomes a wall. A huge red brick wall.

There i am struggling to get through it, however, the mortar on the brick is keeping it up and strong.

Instead, i will try to go over it or maybe even around it.

In a sense, i am writing now, though it is nothing of substance. Perhaps i will try again later 🙂 – the journey to get this far has been tiring.

 

dot.

 

 



{April 5, 2017}   Theme of my Work Life

You can’t know what you don’t know. 

You can’t know about things you have yet been privy too.

Working evenings suck – information wise. We are left in the dark and hope for some light. We are the forgotten People.

People, i find, do not like to share information that will allow you to do your job especially if they are a peer. The idea that you might feel irrelevant if you share information needs to stop.

Every day there is something that i have not been tagged on in an email or was not at a meeting (due to the hours of my shift) which a little information would have came in handy a little later in the evening.

A brief overview or a tag on an email is all i ask. i am sure i can figure it out from there. i am pretty good at that if i have a hint to work with.

The most i can do when i come in is to ask “is there anything i need to know?” “What happened today” or “I checked my email from home, though it seemed quiet, should i know anything for tonight”.

If those don’t spark conversation – i am not any more knowledgeable than when i came on shift.

Talk to my manager and tell him it would be great to know these things… He agrees and suggest asking… LoL – which i laugh to – and Ask “WHAT AM I ASKING ABOUT IF I DO NOT KNOW ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE”.

I remind him every time – I can’t know what i don’t know. He seemed to get the hint – now to get a couple of others on board. i really don’t mind leaving them extra work because i wasn’t told about it…not at this point anyway.

So, back to my paperwork that is piling up. As it took me an hour to figure something out via 4 different people, and a forwarded email from one of them who noticed i wasn’t on it. The kicker – i am the OP Lead for it… i really hate looking stupid on something that could have easily been remedied by one email. This was not a good night to waste an hour.

Nights.

dot.

 

 

 



{April 1, 2017}   Good head space today.

And i am running with it.

It doesn’t feel like a manic.

i just have the energy to get things done – little bursts here and there.

i did need the weekend off from events and people in general.

Sir is working, allowing me to have a mini-me day which really is just housekeeping, ensuring the cats don’t destroy anything, social media – answering email/messages and not be interrupted.

So far the list has been:

water the cats.
empty the dishwasher.
fill the dishwasher
fix/wash blankets on the sofas.
put laundry in: wash/dry
put chicken in the oven for supper
clean the fridge out
garbage to the bin
find a household inventory supply list to manipulate
found a grocery inventory excel sheet 😀

That last one was gold for me – it even has a want/have/need column calculations. Saved me from doing it myself.

The household one i had to move to excel and luckily that didn’t take long.

Anyway – something is dinging in the kitchen, i better figure out what it is and deal with it.

Talk to you all laters.

dot.



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