Seldom Seen Way











{July 30, 2017}   Quote

“A slave’s life is mostly composed of patience and study. Yes, study. If not with actual books, then following the example of greater, senior slaves. Or learning every nuance of their owner’s character, so that they can more completely and seamlessly offer themselves at the right time and
in the right manner. ”

— Laura Antoniou, “The Marketplace”



{July 29, 2017}   Overdrive

Or at least only my brain is. It is 530am and I need sleep. The last couple of weeks I knew something like this would happen. I would fall asleep to only end of waking after an hour and a half… Then attempt to fall asleep again, this time for 3 hours.

Tonight however, my brain knows I am now on holidays till the 8th. You would think I could relax…but nooooo, that would be too easy. Now all I am doing is thinking of all the things that need to be done at home, for both weekends we are “away”, and what will I have to do when I get back to work.

My body on the other hand is tired and sore. I took a couple of pills hoping it will help me calm down enough to get a few hours before Sir gets me up.

I am hoping writing this will help my brain to quiet down enough to keep the noise to a light roar.

dot.



{July 28, 2017}   In a small kink community…

“sloppy” seconds seem to happen a lot – more than i wish to admit. It also means that you know people in ways that others don’t initially.

And watching some of the interactions that are happening in front of you – you want to vomit.

The over “acting” (the facade) while watching said interactions is so fucking unbelievable.

And knowing what a person is like and seeing them make a complete ass out of themselves to “impress” is quite sad – hoping they would have learned something from past mistakes

The part i wish they would learn is to be authentic and instead, they are basically putting on a show to receive any form attention.

i sincerely feel embarrassed for them and more so embarrassed that i had any form of relationship with them in the first place.

Thoughts for the evening.

dot.

 



{July 25, 2017}   Low day

i am feeling low in energy and spirit today. i want to write about what is going on with my days however it seems i -might- offend people if they -think- it is about them.

There is nothing tragic, just patiently waiting for my vacation coming up starting this Saturday. As it is, the weekend is non-stop from the looks of it right now. Also adding to it is news from -e- concerning venue issue for MAsT come September. We need to find a new home.

Anyway, i should drag my arse and get the dispatch done at work. There is many changes happening here to add to my stress – and that includes hiring another person. To be honest i am happy that one of the minions is transferring to the other Plant. It is just causing a bit of chaos for me.

Laters,

dot.

 



{July 15, 2017}   Sometimes i wish…

-had no responsibilities except to stay home and be a greedy little girl – to always be a plaything and enjoy being the hedonist that i am…

– no dishes to wash because you ate finger food

– no laundry because there were no clothes to wear

– no litter boxes to clean – cause they can do that shit outside LoL

and as i am typing this, i am waiting for the dishes to finish washing so that i can dry and put more in, there is a load of laundry washing while the ones that are needed to be folded are on the table waiting for me, and the assholes litter box apparently needs to be cleaned out again.

Now back to reality… Laters.

dot.

 

 

 



I went to the gym with Sir today… and after the initial panic attacks, small frustration in our bedroom and welling of tears in the eyes, body fidgeting, and eye darting… i got through it.

i am grateful that this one is 24 hours and that i will not have to be surrounded by people all the time. i just wish the yoga classes were in the afternoon. They are either EARLY in the morning (sleeping time) or later in the evening (working time). Now instead i need to figure out how to do more of it at home. The oldest daughter Belle had a couple of ideas to help –  i will try that first.

The goal i have is to build strength back into my legs again. It was more of a matter of being consistent.

i am just tired – and i don’t like it. It is time to change it.

 



{July 7, 2017}   False Advertising.

I believe many people false advertise themselves to the point that the people they surround themselves with start believing the same crap that you feed them. Those people help with the “Lie” and breath Life into it.

They exist only because their egos are being stroked, their confidence is being bolstered and they finally feel they belong.

Sadly, they do not realize there comes a point where that will come crashing down around them. Or they know it will, and pray that no one will figure out the charade they are playing.

I feel sorry for them. Karma can be a bitch… I know, I have seen it first hand – and it wasn’t me she was gunning for.

That is my thought for the day.

Be well,

dot.

 



{June 28, 2017}   Honesty is not optional

One of the most common reason most relationships, vanilla and kink, fail is a lack of honesty. It seems the “only as honest as I need to be” mentality is seen as the standard. Interestingly it does not just affect love relationships it includes family and friends too.

The definition of honesty is a sincerity; fairness; and freedom from deceit. A lie is not in the words or the lack of words, it’s the intention of the deceiver; the intent is to elicit a specific response from the asker. To get any insight from honesty a person needs to be able to know their own self and see themselves truthfully. This is a much more difficult concept than people realize and cannot be done quickly.

First off – You need to be honest with yourself. You need to know who you are. You need to deal with all those things that have been hiding in the back dark shadows. You need to quiet your head so that they can be heard and dealt with. Yes, I know – it is difficult – being honest with yourself. It is scary, can be messy, enlightening, freeing all in one. If you can’t be honest with and/or about yourself, you have no place to being a Master to someone while demanding they do the very thing you refuse to do.

Next, you need to be honest with your partner/slave.  You need to candidly relay what you want and need from them while being capable of telling them what you give to them in return. It is never okay to tell them what you think they want to hear; you need to tell them only the truth, no matter how difficult it may be.

And Masters ensure that your slave is honest with you. It is another step in the process of Honesty. It is not enough to hear your slave tell you something, and then go on your merry way. You need to be sure what they are telling you is the truth. It is up to you to confirm you are working with accurate information.

Now I am talking to you from the slave point of view.  I am not trying to be negative and say that a certain party will lie, sure some may, but more often than not that person will simply be ignorant of their own limits, needs, and desires.  It means they have not done the work.

Most of us to evolve and mature have done some work on being honest with ourselves. And this applies to both sides of the slash.  Truth to ourselves; awareness; looking inward to see who we are and where we find strengths or weakness is the hardest work. No one is going to deny that. However, when you do find someone that has put that work into it – it is quite sexy. If you find someone that is just starting that journey, just being there while they explore it, is quite an experience to watch.

When something does go wrong, it’s on you to handle it like a Master – especially if you are going to identify as one – You better damn well act like one. It’s your job to make sure the slave is calm, safe and healthy and to discuss what just happened. You need to accept and own up to any of your own faults, and you need to provide extensive support and compassion. You should not expect to continue having fun that night, or possibly longer – if a situation arises because of a lack of honesty especially to do with play.

Most people forget that honesty is much more than words, it is in your actions too. It does not matter if you repeatedly tell a slave something if your actions contradict your words. That is not honesty, it’s barely halfway there.

The one form of dishonesty that I am not a huge fan of and people seem to disregard is the omission lie. If I don’t mention it, it is like it never even happened – or we want them to believe.

We have all been in relationships where we have withheld things from our partners. It is usually to spare their feelings or to avoid a fight. That is all fine and dandy until your partner figures out that you went out with a friend for drinks the previous night and not home asleep like they assumed. When this happens, whose fault is it? Of course, most will defend themselves by saying that their partner never asked what you were up to that evening, yet your partner assumes that you would be forthcoming in instances such as these.

A deliberate omission can be considered a lie if the lack of information changes outcomes, be it sympathy or choice. You do not owe everyone your intimate life story, however, if you are withholding relevant information to influence a person’s judgment in some way, then it will appear you are lying to them.

The omission seems to become a lie when you intentionally hide something from someone. If you know what you are omitting is, in fact, pertinent and you have a specific motive, well that is most definitely a lie. Any attempt at dishonesty is the same as a lie, regardless if it is done through providing false information or the omission of critical information.

In time, I consider omission is the same as lying if you withhold something pertinent that the other person needs to know.

Lies can happen without you even realizing you are doing it. Other times, you are quite aware of what you are doing. We are all guilty of some form of these. Fuck, I know I can be.

What other things do we lie about?

White lies – I want to include them here. The problem with these little white lies or the ones we “think” are little white lies) can come back to bite you, because regardless of the reason it’s done, it’s still a lie.  “It wasn’t me!”, “Oh yeah, that makes sense”, “I’m 29”, even a “Thank you so much! I just love it!” if said when a situation arises that you don’t wish to “deal” with the circumstance(s).

If you are in a committed relationship and have cheated on your partner, but do not tell your partner, you are still lying to them. Relationships carry the prospects of commitment and by overlooking your indiscretion; you are in fact lying to your partner.

If you fail to tell a friend that you have been pursuing the same person, slowly getting emotionally attached with them please note you are lying to your friend. Think back to high school where this happened a lot, it also happens in the kink community a lot due to a small pool of people.

If you tell people you have been in the community for years that does not equate experience – this is a form of omission and using wordplay to diminish your lack of education on a subject.

When you use fluid definitions relating to relationships (deluding yourself into believing as such), and then contradicted your own self about these definitions at times, when it is more suitable for your own purposes; you are lying.

If you exaggerate or diminish the number of sex partners you have had, you are lying.

If you are asked by your current partner(s) if you have ever cheated on past partner(s) – and you omit this information, you are lying.

Lies of omission happen when there are no guidelines established in advance for multiple partners dynamic.

When someone is masking personal gain for benevolence/service – this is a form of lying.

Not keeping confidential conversations confidential.

The amount of little stupid insecure and irrelevant things a person could lie about in their relationship(s) is abundant if you know what to look for.

Lying about your life in any way is nothing less than being a deception.  You are risking the potential loss of respect. And once trust is lost, it’s hard to restore, and some people never trust the apologetic words of a liar ever again.

When lies of any sort are happening in any relationship – and particularly once they are revealed – they undermine the groundwork that was put into it and erodes the whole foundation.

Trust issues are part of the ‘bones’ of a relationship for me and honesty is what keeps those bones in good shape to make your relationship last.

It will NEVER be optional.

 



{June 26, 2017}   Affirmation

I stay close to my real feeling self. So quiet so sensitive to the being of others. As a master I can never hurt someone’s feelings due to being out of touch with my own. ~ Nanaimo Psychic Medium



{June 23, 2017}   Always be you

lying in bed before bedtime

Sir: My little fae, I’m really happy with you.

me: Well I’m glad You are. What do I do to keep You happy?

Sir: Just by being you.

me: thank gods, cause I don’t know how to be anyone else … It is one of the reasons I could never get into role playing. Weirds me out.

Sir: …

Sir: Fuck….. I love you.

 



et cetera
The Leather Mermaid

Musings of a slave

Beautifully Broken Submissive

Writings about my life as a wife, a submissive, a Pagan, a mother, a daughter, a lover, a student, an educator, a fighter and a peacemaker. Blessed be ⭐❤⭐

Julia Billingsley

Head Full Of Sunshine

The Ninth Life

It's time to be inspired, become encouraged, and get uplifted!

Sheep, Shotguns, Soapboxes and Shitshows

Musings with Happy Bedford, the angry sheep rancher

The Wacky World of Rita

. . . it is what it is

Sublimefemme Unbound

The unadorned intensity of queer femininity

Living With X

BDSM - Its not a lifestyle, its our life.

whipschainsducttape

BDSM~ Learning, Loving and Connecting

Slut, Ph.D.

That's "Dr. Slut" to You

An Alternative Road to Happiness

Join me as I journey through the foreign lands of polamory and D/s to find happiness.

Dancing the Path

A journey of self descovery for a real BDSM submissive

One Slaves Perspective

Living the Lifestyle One Wish at a Time

Enigmatic Amor

Kinky and Curvy

thekinkyworldofvile

This blog contains themes of an adult nature. It is intended for audiences 18 or older. This blog is NOT SAFE FOR WORK. If you are offended by nudity, explicit sexual material, or images of BDSM then this is not the blog for you. Have a great day!!

CinnamonAndSparkles

Cinnamon bites and kisses simultaneously. Vanta Bonna

On A Magic Carpet Ride

Lex's explorations, questions, wonderings, chaotic and usually confusing thoughts laid bare.

Slave Space

A Community For Sharing & Caring

Abezure's Journal

A life in a mixed up two spirited person.

%d bloggers like this: